I’m not sure what I can do to help after the hurricane, so I’m going to urge you guys to laugh at the following events from my day, ranging from slapstick to kafkaesque, so you can feel better:
- Me shoving my way off a bus yelling “one of these pregnant women just robbed me!” while the security guard shrugged and went back to sleep.
- Me chasing down one of the pregnant women and asking politely if I could search her, then going through all her bags while we chatted casually about how bad crime is in the city. (it was the other one that robbed me)
- Me stepping on a board on the sidewalk and the board breaking, then me falling into a hole up to my waist while a bunch of fat guys on motorcycles laughed. A few minutes later several construction workers arrived with a wheelbarrow full of lumber and covered up the hole again. A few minutes later we told one of the workers to be careful because I had fallen in a hole and he shrugged and kept texting on his phone.
- Me filing a complaint against the guard who did nothing to stop the thieves and the man at the complaints desk telling me the guards are not there to protect the passengers but to protect the money in the register.
- Also there’s a big hole ripped in the crotch of my jeans.
I am going home to drink coca tea and watch John Wayne movies. Stay safe up there you guys.